Maniac Monday XXV - Heavy Metal Mania II, feat. Amulet

2013's second Maniac Monday saw me joined live in the studio with three members of London metal quintet, Amulet. Much beer was imbued and jokes were cracked while the guys DJ'd from 9.30-10.30 and, if you missed it, why not listen to or download it below. It's free, after all.
Thanks to Amulet for coming down and shining the ever-burning metal light in forgotten, darkened corners, and also to Paul at Peaceville for letting me preview an edited track from the forthcoming Darkthrone album, The Underground Resistance, which release February 25th. The album is KILLER, so do NOT sleep on the vinyl of that before it sells out. Also, I will be posting a little someting on the artwork for this album real soon, so keep checking back for more.
Next Maniac Monday will be on Feruaury 11th, 'til then... THRASH!!!

Interview with Robba of Morbus Chron

I know I am always banging on about the old bands and styles, so let me hit you off with something new and already decaying, straight out of death metal’s spiritual home, Sweden. Yes, old style it may be, but hey those Swedes are at it again; playing death metal PROPERLY. One of the bands I have come across that really caught my attention, and there a more than a few, are a few guys from a suburb of Stockholm, going by the name Morbus Chron. After giving their demo more listens than was needed, I had no option but to contact them about an interview, something frontman and guitarist Robba more than adequately replied to. In fact, he was also kind enough to send me their recent demo to blog, which features underneath the following interview. Enjoy...

AFITFOG: Okay, so as you are relatively new, and certainly not known outside of the underground here in the UK, tell me a little about where you guys come from and what inspired you to make the old-school kind of Swedish death metal you play.
Robba: What?! I thought we were ‘da bomb’ in the UK dude! Ha ha. So, in the beginning we were three immature classmates living in a typical Swedish suburb, Kungsängen, if you wanna be specific. Edde and Steffe (former drummer) had played for a while under a different moniker. I had just bought a guitar for $80 and was asked to join in on the fun. After that, what can I say? Magic happened; Jesus was resurrected, Obama got elected. Right now, we’re a bit better, a bit older, but that $80 guitar still fuckin’ rocks man. For me, the desire for playing raw death came when we started rehearsing. At that time I was still very new to it all, I think most of us listened to thrash. But one rehearsal, Edde brought a fucking killer mix CD with Death Strike, Autopsy and Pungent Stench on it. And that fuckin’ settled it, we knew we had to do something like that.

Where did the name come from?
Ha ha, you can never avoid this question right? Edde was eating dinner with his family, and I don’t know how or why, but his mother - like any other normal parent - thought that it would be a perfect time to discuss bowel diseases. Anyway, the important part is that she somewhere mentioned a relative or something that was ridden with this horrible disease, Morbus Crohn. Once it was confirmed that victims of Morbus Crohn are likely to bleed out of their ass, we fucking named ourselvess after it. I mean, of course we did! The spelling mistake was not intentional though, ha ha.

What inspired you outside of metal? Any other music genres, movies, etc?
You know, when you wake up early after going to sleep 9 o’clock the day before. You hear that wonderful singing of the birds, and the sun… The sun that creates a shining aura around the houses. The trees, dancing in the breeze of the sea, just smoothly touching my hands as I stretch them toward the blue sky… That’s when you fuckin’ write good metal dude! But no, we’re not very deep musicians. Give me a can of ravioli and a beer, and I’ll write you a song. But I guess you could mention horror-movies for lyrics and that kind of stuff, you know. And a lot of fuckin’ weird ass 60s and 70s music that inspires you to be creative. I don’t know what inspires the other guys, probably porn. I don’t know.

On the recent demo, there are riffs that are reminiscent of Mayhem and even Candlemass in parts, was this intentional (to incorporate other metal sounds than just death metal)?
When we wrote the demo, it was more like, “There’s a cool riff, and there’s a cool riff, let’s put them together and celebrate!” As long as it sounded good, it’d fit on there. So I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re able to find some different kinds of metal in it. I won’t admit to sitting up all night, thinking of clever ways to steal Mayhem and Candlemass-riffs though. But when everything comes around, isn’t that a great recipe for a fantastic morbid death metal soup? Some thrash, some black, some doom, and some death. And fuckin’ tomatoes…

What bands in the scene nowadays are you into and which ones do you find retarded.
I can’t stand any shit-talking or that kind of stuff, so let’s just mention some of the bands we really fuckin’ dig! Maim is damn good, can’t wait for the second full-length. We got Necrowretch and Repuked, two killer bands. Envenomed, Graveless, Gravehammer, Decapitation, Vanhelgd… I could go on forever. Not to forget Bastard Priest, and my fuckin’ favorite band, Swallowed. Our close friends in Mass Death, Abduction and Intestinum, as well. I mean, there’s so many great bands. I don’t even listen to old stuff anymore, I’m too busy with all this new shit.

Why do you think death metal has made such a big comeback in recent years?
For us, we started the band and for some reason we just digged the old ways of death metal. It wasn’t because of bands like Repugnant and Kaamos. I can’t point out any specific reason other than that it was really fun to play and you felt fuckin’ evil screaming your lungs out, going “ZOOOOMBIE RIIIIITUAAAAAAAAL!”. Right now, as the scene is growing, I guess it’s because people realise that this is a damn great way to show off your creativity in a raw and unpolished way. As long as it’s good stuff and I get more demos to buy, I’m happy.

You are currently recording a new EP, correct? Any info?
That’s right dude! “Creepy Creeping Creeps”. It’s gonna be released from the depths in September by Detest Records, the same month that we start the recording of the full-length, so it’ll be like a pre-album release. I’m excited as hell, the artwork by Rafal Kruszyk is killer, and the songs are the Morbus you know, with that Mayhem riff-stealing that separates us from the rest of the bunch, hehe. You don’t really need to know more. It’s gonna be cool.

And onto the future, where do you see yourselves going with the sound you have right now?
Thanks for a great question man. Yes, really, no fuckin’ sarcasm. That’s really what I’m thinking about right now, as well. Where we will take the sound… As far as the EP goes, it’ll be very similar (to the previous releases). Nothing new, different or scary. Even though you might find a small difference, it shouldn’t shock people. Chance is you will find some weird stuff on the full-length though. A little more experimentation. And that’s probably what at least I wanna continue doing, exploring new grounds. But not in a gay progressive fashion with acoustic breaks, no way. More like riffs and structures that make you go sort of like, “What the fuck just happened there man?!” The biggest fear is being predictable. There’s so many old bands that have done it already, who put simple and heavy riffs together, that you just couldn’t get away with today. Although riff-stealing is pretty much inevitable, ha ha. But again, we’ll see what comes in the future. It’ll get your penis hard, that’s for sure.

Morbus Chron (Sweden) Splendour Of Death (2010)

1.Intro
2.In Obscuritas
3.Lidless Coffin
4.Death Strikes

DOWNLOAD

Fortune Cookies Still Rule

So my local Chinese, Wu on Homerton High Street, Hackney, has taken Chinese takeaway back to Bateman-esque 80s standards and compliments each delivery with fortune cookies. So what, I hear you say, fortune cookies are just baby snacks repackaged for retarded Westerners who think they're getting a tip from their soothsaying Oriental friends. Right and wrong. I'm gonna break down what I received in said prophetic apres dinner snacks recently...



These five are basically classic existential confirming messages of positivity that really could be applied to anyone with a head, however they also illustrate quite clearly that currently, you suck a little bit. It does kinda make you feel like the happy-go-lucky guy you always wanted to be. Like Tom Hanks in Big except without actually being Tom Hanks. Actually it's not really anything like that at all is it, they're really just pieces of paper with random messages on them



Hmmm, really? At what, my dad's taxi rank reunion? Shit, I'm really not sure about this one but yeah, go on, I'll take it



Hmmm, I will be going on a cruise. I really, really don't want to though? Maybe this one is for old people or something, I guess there is an old peoples home near my house. Maybe if you gave this to an old person they'd get all happy and full of promise for their impending cruise until they fall over outside Tesco with all their shopping, break their hip (again) and die. Fuck going on a cruise then...



This is my pièce de résistance. This is as good as it gets. This is like when you buy weed and not only is it slightly better than expected, homeboy you just bought it off just topped you up because he made you wait so long. I'm taking this one to the grave with me, where I will rest my head in eternal sleep, a hero for infinity

Fried Chicken And Weed...

Here are a couple of book reviews I did for Vice magazine's most recent issue, The Technology Issue. I guess my expertise in the fields of weed and fried chicken made me an obvious candidate for reviewing books with such topics...


CHICKEN: LOW ART, HIGH CALORIE
Siaron Hughes
Mark Batty Publishers

This is yet another one of my forgotten stoned ideas come to fruition. I must be a virtual millionaire in stoned ideas. It is a book documenting fried-chicken shops in London and the US. I had heard about this book’s intention a number of years back but I was fairly certain it would lack all the classics. But, man, it has them all. It even has ChickPizz in there. And one I’d never even seen before, Hen Cottage. Hen Cottage? Really? “Hi, can I have two pieces of fried hen, please?” Just wrong. What’s with the names, though? I mean, they’re always referencing fried chicken’s spiritual home, America, hence Orlando Fried Chicken, Tennessee Fried Chicken and so on, but Kennedy Fried Chicken? In America I kind of understand, but here? Why would you go to a Kennedy Fired Chicken over, say, Finger Lickin’ Chicken? Anyways, the book focuses more on the graphic impact of the chicken shop, its logo, the menu, and the often suggestive slogans used: “dunk your dipper”, “taste me”, and, well, you get the idea. There are interviews with owners, the dude who designs the signage and even the guy who devises the menus, although there is one ingredient missing. I reckon this book could really have benefited from having a chicken rating section and price guide. There’s nothing about the actual chicken in it and although that might be the point, it’s really made me hungry for my local, Mighty Chicken in Hackney. Which, by the way, is not featured in the book, but offers some pretty heavy deals.


DANK: THE QUEST FOR THE VERY BEST MARIJUANA. A BREEDER’S TALE
Subcool
Quick American Archives

This is a book solely about weed and the quest for the ultimate bud, or “dank”. Wow, even saying that word leaves a really horrible taste in my mouth. The author even goes under the alias “Subcool”. I’m guessing he is using this to protect his identity, owing to the illegality of his profession, but he just come across sounding like a graphic designer who grafs snow in Germany for Banksy fans. There are 37 strains of weed in this book, all of which are products of his breeding and selection. He lists the families he’s bred them from, their sativa and indica count and even describes the flavours like the connoisseur he undoubtedly is. It may well be nicely shot and very informative if smoking bud is your thing, but the kind of guys who sell weed round my way couldn’t give a shit about growing weed “consciously”. In fact, the concept would probably be so alien to them you’d have to spend a fortnight explaining it to them. They just spray the stuff with glue and add crushed glass for weight and not give you 'dank'. It's really a bit frustrating as a weedhead to look at this book. All that amazing weed you're NEVER going to smoke. I guess this is how a paedophile feels at an under-12s football game in the summer. A great 'weed table' book though.

Don't forget my weekly music blog on viceland too...

A Fist In The Face Of... Metal?

90's anti-metal propaganda...

Birmingham, Home of Metal

Last month myself and Ben Rayner went to Birmingham for the Home of Metal exhibition on behalf of Vice. Here are two of the moreinteresting interviews...

Mike Clement

So, you’re Tony Iommi’s guitar tech?
Yes, I’ve been Tony’s guitar tech for 18 years now.

How’ve the 18 years treated you?
They’ve gone rather fast, he’s a good guy to work for, professional.

How many guitars do you need to prep for tours?
Not very many, he tends to use one main guitar and we have a backup. When we’re out with Ozzy, there’s two different tunings so there’s a main and a backup – that’s four guitars. One for the dressing room, tour bus – you’re looking at a maximum of half a dozen, really.

Any horror stories?
Yes (pauses then laughs).

Oh okay. I’ve always wondered, he plays left handed, but he’s missing the tips of his right hand (his fretting hand).
That’s right, it happened in an industrial accident on his last day at work before he left to become a professional musician.

Do you think that has added to the dynamics of his guitar playing?
It has, with hindsight, yes. He was obviously a very gifted guitar player before that and he genuinely thought it was the end of his playing days. Must’ve been absolutely devastating to him, totally.

So he still has the tips in the tins?
He still has the tips in the tins, there’s two tins, one is spare which I keep in my toolkit and the main tin he keeps with him at all times.

Are they now prosthetically made, because originally they were made out of Fairy Liquid bottles?
That’s right, in true Blue Peter style. What we do now is we get two different types made by the artificial limb centre at a hospital in Birmingham. One is what’s called a plastic glove, which is basically a plastic hand and he cuts the finger tips off them. If we get half a dozen hands he’ll find three or four suitable tips. Unfortunately they get brittle with age, so we have to keep looking for new ones. The other type is made out of fibreglass, which he sticks a thin strip of leather on and works oil and talcum powder into it so it has a very smooth surface and that’s what gives him the ability to do those very fast hammer-ons.

Does he use particularly light strings?
He uses extremely light strings, very light. With his accident he had to be very careful as his fingertips, as they are now, are very sensitive. So that was another problem, he couldn’t find guitar strings marketed as guitar strings that were light enough so he had to use banjo strings and select his own sets. The normal gauge we use onstage for the D# tuning is 8-8-11-18-24-32.

Woah. Fuck me, that IS light, he gets such a thick sound though.
A lot of it is actual technique. He does have a very unique technique of playing, I swear some of the bass notes coming out are lower than the guitar can generate and I think, ‘How the hell is he doing that?’ We developed some pick-ups with Gibson a few years ago that were electrically a copy of some originals made in Birmingham by John Birch and John Diggins that are unique in their internal structure…

What do you think of the event anyway?
It’s great. Really, really good. Not a day goes by where I’m not doing something related to Tony’s work.

Nick Bullen

You’re one of the originators of grindcore are you not?
I suppose so yeah.

How did that all come around?
Logically really I suppose, just out of an interest in, eh - trying to express what you were hearing in your head really.

Was it easy in Birmingham, at the time, to find people of similar interests?
Not really no. One of things about liking the more extreme forms of heavy metal and punk was that in Britain at the time they were looked down upon as being less important musically. That is why people who were involved in the early grindcore movement were in very disparate cities across the country but all knew each other, because you would have to write to each other. We were just lucky in Birmingham that three of us had the same idea.

So what were you listening to at the time that you thought wasn’t quite the sound you were after?
The more extreme end of punk that developed in the early 80’s in Britain. What was originally called hardcore thrash, before that term was taken on by metal. Discharge etc. Simultaneously we were listening to a lot of the faster hardcore from America: Poison Idea, United Mutation, groups in Canada like The Neo’s. Bands that were being influenced by Discharge in Scandinavia and to an extent some of the earlier Japanese groups. Also, we were simultaneously listening to more extreme developments in metal, I suppose the bigger groups like Metallica, groups like Death and then groups from Europe like Celtic Frost. You had to search far and wide to try and find music like that. We liked industrial music, we also liked post-punk, particularly bands like Killing Joke.

How do you think the scene developed over the years, how to look at it now?
It seems very healthy, people seem to get very inspired by it. It inspires them to be creative, inspires them to do something they’d like to do which is positive. Obviously it’s solidified into a genre to some extent, which means that sometimes the element of experimentalism and more abstract creativity gets lost.

How do feel about the exhibition?
It’s quite intriguing. I think the project itself, the Home of Metal project, is a very good project, because it combines popular art forms like music with social anthropology and hopefully by involving people it allows them to be as primitive as they want to be. I feel that if you kind of extend different strands of music out to people it’s a positive thing, particularly perhaps for Birmingham where I think to some extent the development of its creativity, in terms of the history of music, largely gets overlooked. I think that’s one thing about pre-grindcore, in the three or four years leading up to it, we had no interest in London, it never produced anything relevant to us.

Do you still follow the scene?
I follow the music, yeah, yeah.

Is there anything still coming out of Birmingham?
I wouldn’t know so much about Birmingham, I’m not a 100%, I guess Anaal Nathrack etc.

You follow any other genres of metal?
Predominantly grindcore because that’s my interest in metal really. I’ve got a little bit of a soft spot for doom metal. I was really interested in St.Vitus when they first appeared back in the 80’s. A lot of metal is predicated on musicianship and virtuosity, and I’ve no interest in that kind of approach. I think it’s a little bit restrictive as well because it means that people can’t express themselves freely, when I first started I only had one string on my bass.

To read the full article click here and here.

Feels Good Man

For the colourblind or just plain colour hating people out there...



Thanks to Matt Furie and Vice.

A FIST IN THE FACE OF GOD

I was just thinking the other day how thrash bands always have a self titled track and how real that is so here's a self titled blog instead. Anyway, apparently 'they' did a survey in 2005 throughout Europe asking people if they believed in God or not and here are the answers. Well done to the Czech Republic by the way



Maybe there should be more of these in London...

Conan the Barbarian+Ketamine=Bathory?

So my housemate turned up at 1AM on a week nite, pissed up with a few wastegash and a bunch of K. I have wanted to re-try K for a while now but it was 2am and I was nearing the end of Boyz n the Hood again, so K was not really right for that specific moment in my life. He did however leave me a bit and to be honest when I got home the following evening the temptation was too much. Conan the Barbarian was on a 12.30 and I thought, 'fuck it' and did maybe two smallish pick-bumps and just sat down on my bed and started listening to Darkthrone 'The Serpents Harvest', then Conan began. I thought this was the one with Grace Jones in it but it wasn't and I actually hadn't seen this one before somehow. Anyway, it was fucking amazing, I was hella confused as its pretty psychedelic in the beginning and there's very little dialogue. Actually, I totally forgot I was watching Conan at all, I was convinced it was a bio of the legendary Swedish black metal band Bathory. Like fully convinced. People were bbm'ing me and I was convinced my BlackBerry Curve had transformed into this piece of shit. However, it did really lend to the movie in a way and I followed the the storyline as meticulously as a cat cleaning its coat. Anyways, the intensity of the sparse dialogue had me gripped tight in a viper like vice, these ones standing out the most...

Thulsa Doom Infidel Defilers. They shall all drown in lakes of blood. Now they will know why they are afraid of the dark. Now they learn why they fear the night.

Subotai He is Conan, Cimmerian, he won't cry, so I cry for him.

Conan For us, there is no spring. Just the wind that smells fresh before the storm.

Subotai Hey, old man, where did you get this stuff?
The Wizard The dead... the gods are pleased with you, they will watch the battle.
Conan Are they going to help?
The Wizard No.
Conan Well, then tell them to stay out of the way.

I guess judging by this cover it isn't hard to see the parallels...

Elecrtric Retard

Electric Retard is the funniest comic strip I've ever seen. It was written by some guy called Eric entirely in MS Paint and is banned in Germany. This particular strip is not even nearly the funniest but the least likely to have my blog deleted. Click here if you have a sense of humour and aren't some kind of pc loser, if not then why are you even here in the first place?

Tube Fuckiness

Whilst at the Queen's for tea recently I noticed she had a BlackBerry so I asked for her PIN. She went out bowling the other nite with Andrew and some other toffs for Di's December remembrance party. Here's what unravelled when she took public transport home that nite...



The Queen-You missed a cracking bit of bowling. I am overhearing the funniest conversation at the moment
Me-Hahahahaha
The Queen-Some guy is getting his mack on like you with a really drunk girl, they've been on a date and he's promising her the world. She's all horny too. They're sat right in front me. They so wanna get it on, but are tiptoeing around it in a really drunk and stupid way
Me-Hahahahahah. Like me? What
The Queen-He just said he's gonna take her to a French wine bar called Beaujolais. Sooooo jokes. They're snogging now. For the first time
Me-I know that place. Its in Soho. I've blates been there hahahahaha
The Queen-He just said the atmosphere is gonna be wonderful
Hahahahahahaha. I'm there. I'm that guy
The Queen-Hahahaha. I meant like you wouldn't believe. Missed a bit. He's massaging her now. This is so weird. He even pulled the hand on the knee massage. I ain't seen that in a while
Me-Hahahahahaha. Classic. Like anyone ever needed their knees massaged
The Queen-I know. They're staring into each others eyes now
Me-They're gonna fuck
The Queen-He just snogged her. She just said, 'where are you sleeping tonight?'
Me-Fuckers fuckers fuckers fuckers fuckers... Worst invitation ever
The Queen-They are literally right in front of me in an empty carriage
Me-She's a 4?
The Queen-Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckers. Nah, she's alright. Might be Spanish. He looks like a a complete thug but is really well spoken. I could reach out and grab her tit right now. Oh my god. They're just staring into each others eyes now, but she is grabbing his chubby. This is happening right in front of me, they must know I can see, there's no one else on the tube and they're a meter away from me. Hahahaha
Me-Get your dick out. Just do it. Take a pic for the blog!
The Queen-Nah, he'd kill me. Hahahaha. Oh my god my camera just flashed. They're looking at me now. They kinda stopped
Me-Hahaha
The Queen-Look down look down
Me-Now get your dick out
The Queen-I know. Hahahahahahhahaha. I am dead. Oh dear
(Sends above picture)
Me-Hahahahahahahahaha. Tell him you thought he was famous and he'll get all blushy
The Queen-I think he is blushy. She's been getting him going for a bit now.
You get that? Sooooo jokes. I still can't look at them. They might kill me. She's trying to toss him off
Me-Hahahahaha. Tube sex. Classic
The Queen-I know. Glad I just got off that one. I think they are too. They got all "comfy" when I left
Me-You're a right paps tonite
The Queen-Hahaha. 'They' just went home to fuck. So jokes.

Indeed.

Tight Clothes=Homosexuality

Really? That's what this Brooklyn group reckon to the new trend of rappers wearing more 'fitted' clothes. I remember a year or so ago when I worked at the Fitted shop some skinny Somalian teenager asking me why I wore my jeans fitted, when I answered he replied, 'but people might think you're gay'. I asked him if he thought I was gay and he said no but he was concerned what other people might think about my attire. Considerate huh.



The comments under the video are priceless. Here's one classic... '
YALL ALL LOOK LIKE BUMASS NIGGAS ANYWAY SO YA NOT IN A POSITION TO SAY NOTHING...YALL LOOK LIKE YALL STINK...STAND ON A BLOCK SELLING NICKS OF GARBAGE MAKING 100$ aA WEEK...AND THEM HOS IN THE VIDEO AINT YOURS...YALL CHIPPED IN TO PAY THESE BRAWDS..FUCK THE OVERLY TIGHT SHIT,BUT YALL STILL SOME BUMASS STINKING LIKE SHIT ASS NIGGAS HAHA' Whatever the fuck any of that means. However one youtuber had this to say, 'Baggy pants were popularized in prison, worn by prisoners as a signal to show other men that they were ready and willing to engage in anal sex.' There it is...

Fucking JOKES Email

I don't know if this is for real or whatever, but this had me laughing out loud (NOT lol'ing) in my stupid fucking office this morning.




Which reminds me, I have THE BEST CV EVER in my possession, as soon as I find it it's going up...